Vomit Comit

I want to puke.  All day.  But I don't.  I feel like I need to just make myself throw up and I will feel better.  Nothing looks or sounds good to eat.  I just want to nap all day and drink lemonade.  I feel like absolute garbage.  I'm sure by now you figured out the reason.  Someone's going to have to be the DD for the Super Bowl this year, bc she is knocked up!!!  I'm not sure whether to be happy or scared. Three kids is a lot.  Did I really want to sign up for this?  I wanna say yes, but I also want to drink wine and not get huge.  But seriously, I want to vomit.  It's just sitting there in my throat waiting.  I just got the shivers and now I have goosebumps all over my body.

I haven't eaten yet this morning bc nothing looked good in the fridge.  And stuff that I ate like a few days ago looks absolutely disgusting today.  The worst part of finding this information out so early, is that you can't go to the doctor until you are at least 8 weeks along.  I don't have an appt until Feb 7th. It feels like January has been the longest month in my entire existence.

Last night I had Chipotle.  It tasted good but I hate that they put red onion in everything.  I tried picking them out but, of course, as always, it's all I taste and my frickin' hands still smell like them.  Even after washing them a million times.   So, here we go again.  All I want to do is vomit.  The hype of going there after putting it off for so long was just shot down by the damn red onion.  Faaak you red onion.  You're the worst onion ever.  

Oh God.  I need to go.  The struggle is real.  

Because, why the hell not.

I know that it's not even February yet, but I thought signing up as head room parent in Caden's room would be a great idea.  It has been easy peasy so far, and I like that I get first dibs on party jobs.   Although it can be stressful and I think it's just because I know what's coming up.  I also like to be prepared.  For the Valentine's Day party, I'm signing up for the "sweet treat" and have a cute idea for that.  I'll need to practice it and eat the cakes in the process.  You know, just to make sure that they are ok for the public.  So since I will have my hands full, I figured I would get the Valentines out of the way.  I made these for Caden and Ryder's teachers.

Caden's Valentines for his classmates are a pencil "arrow" that I made.  That was.....tedious.   And I absolutely hated every second of it.  But they turned out really cute.


Dinner tonight, I was on my own.  I wanted something healthy but also wasn't feeling that great to eat.  So I decided to make a soup.  I made it up myself.  No recipe of course.

Sautéd shallots & jalapeño
Added some silken extra firm tofu to that
Boiled some low sodium chicken broth and water
Microwaved Steam-in-a-bag broccoli
Added everything to the broth & enjoyed every last drop

It was exactly what I needed.  I just wish I made more.  Rode the bike again today, and I felt like I was going to die.  My legs felt so amazing afterwards.  I love how as I'm riding they feel hard as a rock, like I actually have muscle in there hiding underneath all of that fat.  Just squeezed them, NOPE still just blubber.  Dammit.

Went through two toy boxes today and cleared out a lot of stuff again.  Let's see what I can toss tomorrow!!

Unicorns and Rainbows

That title literally has nothing to do with this post.  It's just what is on my coffee cup.  And I might have ADD.   So, I like the new blog layout, however I can't find the spot where I can quickly add a post, so that's annoying.  Could be because I was logged in under my work account.

Workouts.  Still going strong, but it's not much to be excited about since it's still January.  If I'm still going in the middle of March, I will be happy with myself.  I'm starting a lean protein eating plan.  I want to try my hardest to not eat crap or bread.  That is not going to happen.  But I'm trying to make an effort at least.

Clean house.  I walk around my house like the Nazi Cleaning Lady.  Literally just yelling at Ryder in every room.  I clean a room and then he destroys it.  Might be one of the most annoy things ever!  So, that means it's time to get rid of more stuff!!

I'm going to go through a lot of stuff in a couple of months, which will be so refreshing!  Right now, I'm going through the toy bin in the dining room.  Pretty sure I can toss most of that crap!

New Year...New.....Year

I'm not a resolution person.  Mainly because I know I won't stick to it.  I don't have the willpower.  Last year, I started working out and I was doing such a great job.  Then March came around and I just basically stopped.  So, then when it got nicer outside, I started running.  And again, I was so into it.  I did it almost everyday.  I even noticed results (finally). Then school started and I was either too tired, too busy, or let's be honest, too friggin' lazy.  And again here I go with not sticking to things.  A friend told me about this new workout place.  We can drop off our kids at school and go over and do it.  I asked her if it was going to actually kick my ass.  Because I need something to whip me back into shape.  Well, it did.  I felt so amazing after class.  I was in a great mood and even though I still was not happy with my body I knew that there will be results because I was IN PAIN!  Thank the Lord!  I found something to hold me accountable.  I set up an account and signed up for a lot of classes.  Then I got sick.   One night after being sick for 3 weeks, I coughed and popped something in my back.  Haven't gone to the doctor for it, but I can't lay on that part of my back because it hurts so bad.  It feels like there is a mass in there.  So weird.  And once again, I stopped working out. And once again, I was in crappy moods.  And once again, I was in a rut.  Did NOT like how my body looked.  I felt huge and I was tired all of the time.  Lead to winter break.  I went to bed after midnight almost every night and woke up around 930 everyday.  I was off my routine and not happy.  Cue the new year....

I didn't start working out on New Year's Day.  Again, I'm not a resolution person.  I'm not about to start being all healthy Day 1 of the new year.  However, I did clean my house a little bit.  I'm sick of seeing clutter everywhere, it gives me anxiety.  Slowly, I'm going through things and tossing stuff.  We got rid of a lot in the kids' playroom, I decluttered the kitchen counters, we finally hung up stuff on the walls.  The stuff that has been collecting dust while sitting on the floor next to where they should have been hung.  I got rid of some clothes, too.  And this is just the beginning.  I'm feeling very good about purging this stuff, so I think it's going to continue.  And my cough is slowly going away.  I still can't hit the high note when I sing, which is very frustrating.  No joke, my voice just goes completely silent when I hit certain notes.  But since I'm feeling a little better, I started working out again.  Trying to ride the bike at least 3-4x/week.  I started the Sex & The City series again for like the 100th time, watching while I ride.  And today I got back into working out at The Set.  And Adam kicked my ass again!  I swear I won't be able to lift anything tomorrow.  I can barely move my arms.  :)  Also, while I was doing some lunges, I put my hands around my hips and I actually felt skinnier.  I know there is no way that I've lost pounds just from riding the bike 4 times in the past year....but hold up....I weighed myself.  I was about 132 during the holidays. This morning I was at 128!!!  Yes, I know there cannot be anyway of seeing results already, but I'm feeling better about myself and I'm going to go with that!

February is coming up and is usually a rough month for me.  Living in Northeast Ohio, we don't see the sun shine from December-March.  And February is the time I realize that I'm ready to kill myself. One year, I took a trip by myself to Arizona and it was amazing!  I needed that February Recharge.  This year, I think Jimmy should do it.  But he probably won't, so maybe I can sneak in and do it!

So, hopefully I will continue to stay on this road to happiness.  But as history has repeated itself in the past, I'm sure I will get bored and lazy and just stop.  I am really enjoying getting rid of things though.  No joke, I want to go through a room today and just throw shit out.